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Parents Are Key to Kids' Online Safety

One of the most important ways to protect your children from the dangers on the Internet is to be knowledgeable about the cyber-world they visit during much of their day. It is a place where they learn, meet to catch up with friends, and show off their skill and expertise. It is an important way for them to fit in with their peers. The Internet is the way of the future, and children will continue to expand their mastery of technology as a part of their evolving generation’s distinct experience.

It is important for parents to guard against letting fear and lack of knowledge direct family guidelines for Internet safety. This tactic will likely close the doors of communication between parents and children, and will place the children at great risk. Children are more likely to remain silent about their negative experiences online if they fear their computer or Internet access will be taken away.

Instead, parents should arm themselves with knowledge about the Internet, and have clear and open communication with their children about both the dangers and the benefits of the Internet. Today’s teens, and even pre-teens, have a vast understanding of the Internet, while their parents are often much less familiar with the Internet and related technology.

The following is a brief overview of some areas and activities now popular among children. While each activity is briefly described, the very best way to truly familiarize yourself with these activities is to go on the Internet yourself and explore these sites. In this way, you will best be able to supervise your child’s online activity.

Public Access Personal Websites:

These are sites such as “My Space,” “Facebook,” “Yahoo! 360,” and “Xanga,” to name a few, and they are often referred to by children as “blog sites.” There are many sites like these. They are free, and children of all ages can use these programs to create a personal web page all about themselves. These companies require children to be over a certain age to join; however, there is no way to verify age, and children usually give a false age in order to gain access.

The danger in these personal websites is that the information children place on their web pages is often far too detailed, and can be used by individuals who prey on children to locate, stalk, lure, or even abduct a child. No personal information that can lead a predator to a child should ever be placed on these sites. Your children will tell you that only their friends can talk to them through these websites, but that is not accurate; any member can access another member’s page.

USE BEST PARENT CONTROLS:

  1. Visit your child’s site regularly and review it. Do not allow your child to tell you this is private; it is not; it is a public space and anyone can read it.
  2. Work together with your child to create safe and creative self-expressions online.
  3. Require your child to remove any identifying information such as name, address, school, birth date, or other items that could lead a predator to your child.
  4. Prohibit your child from speaking online with anyone you and your child have not met in person.
  5. Keep your child’s computer in a public area of the house and supervise his or her activity.

Online Games:

There are many games, such as “World of Warcraft” and “Runescape,” on the Internet that allow interactive dialogue between players. Some of these games require a monthly fee; however, there are many that are free. On any give day, over 130,000 people may be online playing a particular game.

Some online game companies do not maintain records for identifying a player to a specific individual. For that reason, it is more difficult for law enforcement to catch child predators using these games. A recent arrest was made in Texas after a predator used the game “Everquest” to meet and exploit a young girl.

USE BEST PARENT CONTROLS:

  1. Learn the games your child plays on the Internet and know the screen name he or she uses to be identified by others.
  2. Educate your child not to give out any personal information and to terminate conversations with individuals who make your child feel unsafe or uncomfortable.
  3. Help your child to create a new online character/player if the existing one becomes compromised or threatened.
  4. Monitor your child’s activity to help use these games in a safe and fun way.

Chat Rooms:

Chat rooms are places on the Internet where individuals with similar interests meet. The very best way for you to see how this works is for you to log onto a website with chat rooms, such as America Online or Yahoo! and look at the titles of these rooms and the format for discussions. You will see that the virtual “room” is simply a list of screen-names with little to no actual dialogue. That is because “chatting” is done in instant message (“IM”) or private chat form. The content of those chats is not automatically preserved by the software provider when the computer is turned off or the chat is concluded.

For this reason, many things can be said during a chat that the writer thinks are private. Many instant message programs have a feature within the software that allows users to log the content of all chat sessions. Parents can turn this feature on and can learn if their children have at some point turned the feature off. This feature can generally be accessed through the toolbar under the category “preferences” or “options” and is further listed under the heading of “archive.” When selected, the software prompts the user with instructions and questions to enable this feature.

USE BEST PARENT CONTROLS:

  1. Determine which chat room your child visits and monitor the chat that took place, using the “archive” function (described above).
  2. Watch your children. If a child shuts off the monitor or minimizes the screen when you approach, a parent should investigate.
  3. Locate computers with Internet access in a common area of the house that offers little privacy.

Finally, the best “golden rule” for protecting your children on the Internet is to have an “open-door policy” about their use of the Internet. Children need to know that telling a parent about negative experiences on the Internet will not deprive them of access, but will instead provide them with the help they need to be protected from these dangers. Children are more likely to tell a parent about inappropriate chat dialogue or sexual solicitations if they know they will not be punished for another person’s actions.

In this new age of technology, our children have an advanced savvy with computers. So, consider enjoying the rare experience of letting your children teach you a thing or two. In the process, they will know they have an ally and an advocate they can trust.

Written by Florida Attorney General Charlie Crist
and Maureen Horkan, Director, Attorney General's Child Predator CyberCrime Unit

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